Before the jump into my philosophical spillage, here's the other talented artists I do this thing with every month!
For this months 10 on 10 I'm going to talk about life, and how all of ours are different and what we all want out of this one life we have is different.
Some people gravitate as quickly and smoothly as possible on settling into a routine, something they can rely on and depend on, a security, something they can be certain will always be there.
For me it's different, I'm a realist, and my reality is that anybody who relies on certainty is bound to be setup for disappointment all in the simple fact that the only absolute certainty we have in life is that one day it will end and everything we experience between now and then is all we will have to look back on and answer the question of whether or not we lived it to the fullest. The conflict and questions I constantly ask is how do I want to invest such valuable and limited time and what is most important to me as an individual, an artist, not what's important to everyone else.
As a bit of a control freak, surprisingly I love to rock the boat and regularly inflict change in what I am doing or where I am going in life, whether it be on a creative or personal level, I easily (maybe too easily) become dissatisfied with things that eventually seem stale or old to me and this "thing", this drive I have lurking inside of me has lead to a point where yesterday, I delivered what has hopefully become the last freelance project I will ever do working for somebody else.
I've hit a point where my success as a senior visual effects artist, specifically a Nuke Compositor, has become a crutch for me to lean on both financially and systematically to continue on a path that really has no end. Although this has completely enabled me to do all the other things I love in life like travel, (see, photograph, film, experience) music, adventure, etc...., it was lacking life in and of itself. I needed something new, something fresh, something adventurous, something questionable, something challenging, something unknown.
This led to the birth of TAR+FEATHER, a production company and collective of all things art and music that I have started with two very talented directors, Jared Varava and Carlton Sugarman. Along with this has come a fair amount of sacrifice in the foundation I have spent the last 6 years building for myself, although an extension of this base it is kinda like starting over to move forward, not a new concept for me but still a weird one. Pushing off into the unknown is always a bit scary and unnerving. One sacrifice accompanying this new venture is a new home, leaving probably the most beautiful home and location I've ever lived in Topanga Canyon to move back to the city, the heart of Los Angeles and existence of the creative community we intend to thrive with.
It is bittersweet, for sure. Exhausted after over a month of struggling to find a new house in Northeast LA (Echo Park, Silverlake, Highland Park) among the extremely competitive market where it is almost impossible to find something you like without having 20 other people who have found it as well and want it just as bad as you do. The perfect place came along and everything fell right into place as it needed to for me to get the house, which also came with an extremely sweet and thoughtful landlady which was very important to me. It basically had everything I was looking for at about 25% less than I've been paying the last 3 years. After telling my friend the story, she sent me this quote which I found quite fitting to all of the change I have brought upon myself:
"And, when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it." -- Paulo Coelho
It's these moments of clarity and comfort within the unknown that reassure me the decisions I've made are the right ones even amongst the occasional doubt or lack of confidence in them.
ABOUT THE PHOTOS:
Ceschi Ramos is one of my favorite artists and songwriters but his stage presence and ability to bring energy to a room of usually die hard fans, is almost second to none. These photos are quite fitting to the theme of "change" for the fact that he writes a lot about change in society and humanity as well as a lot about personal perseverance through the struggles of change and the ability to push past it to reach new heights. As you'll see in one of the photos, he has a completely normal hand with 3 fingers and a thumb, hence the name of his label FAKE FOUR INC. and just one of the presumable challenges he has faced in his own life, which probably even pushed him at one point to make it to where he is today. He didn't get here by taking the safe route, I guarantee you that much!